Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I don't remember where I saw this web banner...

...but it annoys the HECK outta me. Ya, that's right. I said it. HECK.

I mean really??? A horizontal banner ad... and they just rotated a vertical photo? Those lazy, cheap, sillypantses! This is not approved behavior.



Save money by purchasing cheaper banner ad real estate?

Check.

Save money by not hiring someone to design a horizontal version of the ad?

Check.

Well, maybe it was their way of being funky and different. You think?



Hrmmm. I agree with hippo.

Imagine Me and Mole


Dear Mole,
As long as I can remember you've sat on the upper left side of my nose. You've seen me through thick and thin. Through my awkward stages. Through relationships. Through friendships. Through multiple people trying to rub you off, thinking I had dirt on my face..and then through their embarassed looks as they realized the error of their ways. We've been through laughter, tears, and of course, a few tasty brews every once in a while. We were thick as thieves, you and I. Sigh.

But then you started to get bigger...and well, I didn't wanna have a huge face mole ten years from now. Basically, what I'm trying to say is... I chopped you off this morning. Do forgive me.

Me and you. You and me. No matter how they toss the dice, it had to be.

Sincerely,
Montastic

Monday, October 26, 2009

beliefs

i do believe in AWESOME hand sanitizer


i don't believe in fractioned speed limits


i do believe in drive-thru liquor stores

happy monday!

Friday, October 23, 2009

andremo in qualche posto bellissimo.


le sigh. love it.

the importance of a hyphen, knee problems, heaveno


They grow 'em tall in Baltimore! Watch out for those toweringly tall officers!


I understand you big guy. Both my knees hurt to. So it's not unlikely that I'd be grabbing one in pain one day, and have a brace on the other the next day.


You're right. The "hell" did just slap me right in face. How could I have been so blind! Seriously?

All found on Criggo. A site I heart.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

but mah car wuz builded in 'Merica

Actually, no it wasn't. I drive a VW Jetta. And this billboard is tops!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Mando Diao - jammers!



I heard these guys a few weeks ago and have just been lazy about posting them. Great sound! Great energy! And from Sweden.

An awesome song of theirs is Dance With Somebody. The official video has embedding disabled, so be sure to check out the actual video for the song youtube. It's really great. And makes wanna just get up and...well...dance with somebody.


A bunch of musical Swedes who look like a buncha Swedes. Rad.

whimsy

want

just before the snow



It's mushy and snowy and wet today. Wet snow. The kind that looks like you could scoop it all into a cup and make a snowcone. Slush.

However---I must say, I absolutely enjoy the clouds just before the snow rolls in. They are not too far off in the distance, and the cover every bit of sky you can see. They are grayish with a hint of brown. Really truly ugly. And they look cold. And they look wet. And they are so discolored compared to the beautiful whiteness they release.

Mmmm! I can't wait for more snow.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Beauty is relative. So is ugliness.

This weekend me and the boy went to the Pumpkin Festival (hooray!). Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. I was naturally very excited about this.

We bested the corn maze is a cool 18 minutes. Ate some nachos. Then went in search of the perfect pumpkins.

The horror! Only October 18th and most of the pumpkins were rotten and mushy. Though one can attribute this to the fact that we had freezing temperatures and then temps near 80 (thus freezing, then boiling the pumpkins), I couldn't believe it. We walked around forever until I finally found one I thought was just perfect. Sure it had a retarded side, but don't we all?

About twenty minutes more of searching yielded my honeypants a similarly disabled-yet-aiiiight pumpkin. Awesome. Home we went with our bounty.

We placed them by our door and went to bed merry. Well, Monday morning came. As I was leaving for work, I peeked out our pumpkin preciouses. GOOD GOLLY! Ugly. Two hideous little pumpkins. And I was looking at their "good" sides. Wow.

Never did I expect to find my own baby ugly. But here I was. Hatin' on my ugly pumpkin child.

I guess amongst the other uglier pumpkins at the patch, these were royalty! But taken away from the slums, well...they were disappointing.

Moral of the story: I guess that's why Chase's mom told her to not to be friends with girls that are prettier than her. It all makes sense now. BOOYA!


on an unrelated note:

Monday, October 19, 2009

videogioco

wow this blows my mind. i mean the amount planning, folding, drawing, creativity that went into this. absolutely amazing.

crazy italians! nice work.

VIDEOGIOCO by Donato Sansone from Enrico Ascoli - Sound Design on Vimeo.

i'm glad my friends look out for me

well...and Honda.


A friend of mine sent me this link, stating that it would help me with my knee problems.
So...no worries if my knee doesn't ever get better. With the help of the Honda Walk Assist 2, I'll be a whole new woman!

I'm particularly excited for the function you see at :56 seconds.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Black Uterus Undies, oh ya baby

Nothing sets the mood like black uterus undies (only available in XL, sorry petite anatomy-lovin ladies!).

I can just see it playing out. The moment of truth has arrived, and...

"what the---is that a uterus?? and...and ovaries?"
"AND a cervix sweetheart."

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

people and travel

Lots of travel going on the past week. I was Montana for work, then in Solitude, Utah for a 4day anniversary weekend.

Lots of travel. Lots of people watching.

On my plane from Billings to Denver, I sat next to an older, retired gentleman. He was on a two-week fishing vacation with his brother-in-law. They had been through Yellowstone National Park and all over Montana in their travels. They hit an elk going 60 mph at nighttime and totaled their rented Ford Escape. They vetoed a 6-hour fishing trip in 20-degree weather. And they stayed away from driving in the snow because they were from Florida and "wouldn't know two ways about nothing" when it came to driving in the snow. As we got close to landing, the man leaned over to me, smiling with all his years and said "I just loved it. Fishing in Montana was on my bucket list." And that was that.

Our flight out of Billings was a little late. They only had a 20 minute layover and had to hustle (to the best of their ability), fishing poles in hand, from gate 87 to gate 14. A long way for anyone. I like to think they made it. In fact, I know they did.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

a good grammar moment!

So the Albertsons by my place is being renovated. This means that the express aisle has no actual sign, just a paper posted one. Which a renegade grammar lover (not unlike myself) took the liberty to edit.

It's hard to see but "less" is crossed out and "fewer" is written above it. AMAZING!


For those who don't know:

"less" is used for quantities that CANNOT be counted.
ie: use LESS sugar. there is LESS water in the tub.

"fewer" is used for quantities that CAN be counted.
ie: there are FEWER cookies. FEWER than 15 items.

My goodness I got way too excited when I saw that someone else proudly fixed a flawed sign. If only they could somehow edit that darned chipotle billboard.

This nerd moment brought to you by Montastic.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

relationships are hard

with family. with lovers. with friends.

relationships are hard.

because with family, you can't always tell them what you really think. you have to accept them. there are just certain things that don't get voiced. but, because it's family, those things are generally understood without saying a thing.

because with lovers, depending on where you are in the romance, you're always wondering where it's going. you're always thinking about the future and measuring up a potential partner. whether it's sizing them up for a lifetime of love, or just for a night of fun. judgment is there.

because with friends, communication isn't needed really. you catch up when you can and that's that. and with friends, you get more honesty than anywhere else. and honesty isn't always fun. friends leave you for family, for lovers. friends come and go. friends are unpredictable.

ya, relationships are hard.
but they are totally worth it.

because with family, they'll accept you no matter what. they'll pick you up when you're at lowest. and support you through your mistakes.

because with lovers, i mean shoot. you'll build a life. a family. if you can see through all the second-guessing. plus you get sex. bonus!

because with friends, you laugh hardest, cry hardest, drink hardest, bond hardest. friends are where it's at. and you can be friends with lovers and family. every relationship starts with a friendship.


to sum up: i need more friends.

Monday, October 5, 2009

the way i see it

- using a billboard to promote an online marketing scheme is ironically backwards to me.


- this burglar is a fool. but i want to know the joke.


- sporting a pink unicorn fanny packs is the best way to embrace my hate of pink and love of boobs, while walking 60 miles for the Komen foundation.


- grad school is not too far off. tra-la-la.

- i could listen to this song on loop for hours. easily in my top ten. easily.


- Murphy's law is just a way to sum up all the things we lose control of in our lives. a bundled excuse, wrapped up as an adage.

- only about 3 people read this blog. i'm beginning to wonder what the point is.

- starting everything with "the way i see it" (like on Starbucks' cups), while really redundant, makes you feel much more wise. much.


...at least that's the way i see it.

Friday, October 2, 2009

where the magic happens

scenes from 'round the cube