Saturday, October 4, 2008

Wax Removal Kit: A Montastic Consumer Review

Product: Sally Hansen Spa Wax Hair Removal Kit
Goal: try home waxing, and succeed

So I thought this could be a really great thing. I heard from a ladyfriend of mine that this actually works very well for a home kit. Now, I've never had anything waxed ever, personally or professionally. Something about tearing hair follicles out by the roots just didn't seem pleasant.

But, I figured I'd give it a try. Plus this smells like lavender, which as aromatherapy is concerned, is relaxing. So I tried it about 4 months ago for the first time. The result: the wax strip came out with NO hair on it. And half the wax was left on my skin. This horrific failure was accompanied with great pain as I had to try to re-wax the same section of red, angry, uncompromising skin. To no avail. So I tried a different spot. Maybe less was would work better. Again...massive pain. But one hair came off. Let's have a parade to celebrate the insanely painful process of removing one GODDAMN hair. sticky, defeated, and hairy... i put the wax away.
strike one you waxy bastard.

trial two was a couple months ago. I got the nerve to try it again. i had a new method of pulling that i was sure would work. the result: the same as before. shit. except this time, on the recoil, the wax strip stuck to my forearm, which required careful and uncomfortable removal. so now i had sticky wax residue in two separate places. oh but at least the aromatic lavender was keeping me relaxed and soothed. oh wait. no it wasn't.
strike two you messy turd product.

after this experience i shared my pain (emotional and physical and psychological) with Perry. she told me she would throw it out. it sounded no bueno. why keep it? all logical points...except i have a hard time throwing out something i bought that didn't fulfil its purpose.

trial three was just now. the result:

strike three. enjoy the landfill.

oh yes, one more thing...
it wasn't my legs i was trying to wax.
so if u want to experience violent pulling, tearing, and ripping at all the hairs your special place...please visit my bathroom garbage receptacle. don't worry. it smells like lavender.

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